The (Real) Moment Of Truth

Right now, I am watching a program on mnet series, my wife seated by me and my wonderful kids playing around me. The program is “The Moment of Truth”. I have seen this program a couple of times now. I don’t know if I like the program or not. I think I have reservations about it. It’s a good show but really, I find some of the things that happen on this program amazing. As always, I chose to learn a lesson.

The Moment of Truth is an American game/reality show. Contestants answer a series of 21 increasingly personal and embarrassing questions to receive cash prizes. The show is hosted by Mark Walberg. Prior to the program, the contestant is connected to a polygraph before being asked these personal questions. They are supposed to answer “True” or “False” to the questions and the polygraph reveals if their answers are indeed True or False. They get monetary rewards for the number of questions they answer truthfully. You will often hear the host say something like “This is your $25,000 moment of truth”. I am not sure you will appreciate this until you watch it. The questions sometimes gets really personal, foe example, “Have you ever fantasized about having sex with one of your co-workers”, “Will you rob a bank if you knew you wouldn’t be caught”, “Did you invite anyone to your wedding that you previously had sexual relations with”, “Do you have any secret that you know will end your marriage?”, “Will you have sex with another woman if you know you will never be caught?”, “ Have you ever being paid for sex?”, “ Do you believe you will be married to your husband for the rest of your life?” and other similar questions. I have watched how disappointed many husbands, wives, mothers, fathers and family members are after they hear some of the answers. Many of them that started the show clapping, shouting and with smiles leave the stage in tears. They leave surprised about secrets they never knew existed. It could be devastating! I saw a particular edition that was so bad that I will be very surprised if the marriage survived that night? Though you are only on the hot seat for a few minutes, what stares you in the face is integrity or lack of it, honesty or lack of it, faithfulness to your wife and family or lack of it that you have built over your life time. In less than 60 minutes, your values will be brought to test.

Can you imagine being on such a seat that you have to answer “True” or “False” to any question that you will be asked? Can you imagine your deepest secrets being revealed on live television? How will you feel if you have no choice but to seat on this program and answer the questions truthfully (it will be revealed to all if you lie). My guess is that you will dread the occasion.

The truth however is that none of us can run away from such moment! There is a Moment of Truth coming that you do not have a choice about. You do not need to like it. It is coming. It will soon hit you. Every secret will be revealed, not just on line television but for all to see. Everything done in secret will be revealed. Every secret email will be exposed. Every secret phone conversation will be heard live and clear. Everyone, yes everyone, will stand before the judgment seat of God. “Sooner or later we'll all have to face God, regardless of our conditions. We will appear before Christ and take what's coming to us as a result of our actions, either good or bad” says God’s holy word. Are you ready for this day?

Think about this for a moment- What if all emails that you have ever sent could be retrieved and displayed on a screen? What if all your phone conversations could be replayed back? What if all the times you spent in secret could be replayed? What if your innermost thoughts could be revealed on a screen? The truth is this…..they can! Yes, they can. One day, it will all be revealed. What manner of people ought we to be knowing this truth? There is nothing that you are doing now that will remain hidden. Absolutely nothing. One day, we will all sit before the Throne of God, and we wouldn’t have to say a word. The books will be opened and the scenes brought to light. We should all live our lives, like one day, we’ll give account, because we will!

One day, not too far from now, God will be our host on the real “Moment of Truth” where all you have ever done in secret, both good and bad, will be exposed. Are you ready for this moment? I perceive God will ask “This is you eternal life moment of truth”. What a day that will be.

Wanted - Honest Men

We live in a world that has become so obsessed with success and material wealth at the expense of all else. It’s very rare to see men and women of integrity who would hold on to their righteousness by all means. “The end justifies the means” is now the motto of several people, all in a bid to amass wealth. It is a tragedy!

Sometime last week, a colleague sent a story to me by mail. I had read this story a few times before now, but this time around, it made more sense to me. Can I share this story with you? It is an old Ghanaian fable.

“An aging king woke up one day to the realization that should he drop dead, there would be no male in the royal family to take his place. He was the last male in the royal family in a culture where only a male could succeed to the throne - and he was aging.

He decided that if he could not give birth to a male, he would adopt a son who then could take his place, but he insisted that such an adopted son must be extraordinary in every sense of the word. So he launched a competition in his kingdom, open to all boys, no matter what their background.

Ten boys made it to the every top. There was little to separate these boys in terms of intelligence and physical attributes and capabilities. The king said to them, "I have one
last test and whoever comes top will become my adopted son and heir to my throne."

Then he said, "This kingdom depends solely on agriculture. So the king must know how to cultivate plants. So here is a seed of corn for each of you. Take it home and plant and nurture it for three weeks. At the end of three weeks, we shall see who has done the best job of cultivating the seed. That person will be my heir-apparent. "

The boys took their seeds and hurried home. They each got a flower pot and planted the seed as soon as they got home. There was much excitement in the kingdom as the people waited with bated breath to see who was destined to be their next king.

In one home, the boy and his parents were almost heartbroken when after days of intense care, the seed failed to sprout. He did not know what had gone wrong with his. He had selected the soil carefully, he had applied the right quantity and type of fertilizer, he had been very dutiful in watering it at the right intervals, he had even prayed over it day and night and yet his seed had turned out to be unproductive.

Some of his friends advised him to go and buy a seed from the market and plant that. "After all," they said, "how can anyone tell one seed of corn from another?" But his parents who had always taught him the value of integrity reminded him that, if the king wanted them to plant any corn, he would have asked them to go for their own seed. "If you take anything different from what the king gave you, that would be dishonesty. Maybe we are not destined for the throne. If so, let it be but don't be found to have deceived the king," they told him.

The D-Day came, and the boys returned to the palace each of them proudly exhibiting a very fine corn seedling. It was obvious that the other nine boys had had great success with their seeds. The king began making his way down the line of eager boys and asked each of them "Is this came out of the seed I gave you?" And each boy responded, "Yes, your majesty." And the king would nod and move down the line. The king finally got to the last boy in the line-up. The boy was shaking with fear. He knew that the king was going to have him thrown into prison for wasting his seed.

"What did you do with the seed I gave you?" the king asked.

"I planted it and cared for it diligently, your majesty, but alas it failed to sprout." the boy said tearfully, as the crowd booed him.

But the king raised his hands and signaled for silence. Then he said, "My people behold your next king." The people were confused. "Why that one?" many asked. "How can he be the right choice?" The king took his place on his throne with the boy by his side and said, "I gave these boys boiled seeds. This test was not for cultivating corn. It was the test of character; a test of integrity. It was the ultimate test. If a king must have one quality, it must be that he should be above above dishonesty. Only this boy passed the test. A boiled seed cannot sprout." ”

The single most important quality you can ever develop that will enhance every part of your life is the value of integrity. Integrity is the core quality of a successful and happy life. Having integrity means being totally honest and truthful in every part of your life. By making the commitment to become a totally honest person, you will be doing more to ensure your success and happiness in life than anything else you can ever do.

Will you stand up to be counted with men of integrity?

I will share a bit more about Integrity in details in my next post. Till then, stay on top!

Living A Life Of Integrity

Can you ever make a commitment that people can take to the bank? I remember vividly, as I began writing this article, a tattoo I saw on an army officer in one of the films I saw “Death before Dishonour”. How I wish everyone could make this their motto. That’s one of the reasons I am writing.

Our world is in short supply of men and women with personal integrity and honesty. With more sophistication, it’s even easier to throw integrity to the garbage bin. From the salesmen on the street to the CEO of multinationals, from the Student Union Executives of our colleges to the National Assemblies of our nations, people have underestimated the importance of consistently living up to a set of ideals. What a tragedy!

Now, what is integrity? Integrity is from the Latin word “integer” which means wholeness, an unbroken or unreduced completeness, totality, incorruptibility, the quality or state of being complete or undivided. The concept of wholeness or consistency refers to behaviours and decisions which are consistently in line with our principles. These principles should generally be accepted as ethical and honest. Note that the key here is “consistency”.

One of the important elements of integrity is consistency - if we are unpredictable, if our decisions are dependent upon the day of the week, and the way we are feeling, others are unlikely to see us as maintaining integrity. How often have we changed the rules in the middle of the game for our own benefit or to the undue advantage for others?

More than 80% of business is from repeat clients and referrals. Word gets around. If you say that you will do something, is it going to get done? Is it going to get done when you said it will be done? Is it going to be the exact quality (or better) that you committed to? If the answer is yes, I can guarantee that you will succeed in business, for 2 reasons. One, you will get several repeat clients and referrals. Two, it is sad but true that most of your competition lacks integrity. Believe me. Integrity will give you a competitive edge! People are willing to pay extra for guaranteed services.

Businesses built on falsehood cannot and will not last. Read the dailies and listen to the news and you will be confronted everyday with the dilemma of integrity. Today, companies that seem to have done tremendously well 5 years ago do not even exist anymore! Need I give examples? Look closely at companies that have been around for a long time, you will see a culture of integrity. They may not always be right but they are honest. The may sometimes take wrong decisions but they did it in the integrity of their hearts and with the available data. Companies with the foundation of integrity are built to last.

There are several benefits of living with Integrity. Some of them include

-When you stick to what you know is right or wrong, you don’t regret anything you have done.

-People follow your example and act more honestly.

-Your powers of observation are more accurate. You can see the truth about others more easily.

-No needs to keep your stories straight as your stories are facts. Less mental work is required. You don’t have to tell a lie to cover another lie.

-You handle rejection and criticism more easily. For example, you are not bothered if someone says, "You charge too much!" As you have no doubt that your fees are fair, you know the other person has the problem.

-You have fewer personality conflicts with others even when you are aggressive.

-When you make a mistake, it is easy to accept responsibility and move forward. Honest men also make mistakes. They accept responsibilities for such mistakes, fix what is wrong and go on to succeed. They are honest also with what worked and what didn’t.

-You earn the reputation as a person with integrity. For example, employees brag about honest bosses. "He might be more honest about your work than you might want to hear, but he’s fair and doesn’t lie." This way, you build a performance driven organization. Your people know you are honest and upfront with them about their performance and they will do their best to improve.

-Your odds of being sued, fined or convicted of a crime go way down.